I must be the first to say, I am not good at making decisions nor am I great on focusing in a certain direction when it comes to life or ministry. Seriously, I have so many grand ideas, or see potential for so many things but making the right choices or staying headed in a certain direction is a bit hard for me!
However, God is showing me more and more the need to streamline in certain areas of my life. I guess He is making me realize that despite my ambition to be "Super Mom/Wife/Ministry Asst" I cannot possibly juggle it all. I think someone once said something to the affect of "It's better to do a few things well, than to fail at many things" or maybe I just made that up but either way it is the point I am at. I want to do the "few" things God has called me to do WELL and not fail at many.
So, here I am at this point of needing some direction from the Lord in making the decisions on what to "give the axe" and what to stand firm in and do well. Wham! It hits me over the head like a beam! "Do what you are passionate about!" Duh!!! Primarily this is in terms of involvement in ministry and in the church but also in some other things as well. Of course, I can't just stop being a Wife and Mom and yes I am passionate about being the best in those areas as I can. However in ministry, it's different. I see a need, I know that I CAN do it, so many times I do - but it may or may not be where my passion is. For instance, I CAN work with preschoolers and children in our church but this is not where my heart lies. I CAN organize or help with church meals but this is definitely NOT where my heart is!
Where is my passion and my heart when it comes to ministry? With women and specifically women of preschoolers and young elementary age children. I get excited about the opportunity to reach out to them and minister to them on a one on one basis and as a group. I simply have a heart to meet ladies wherever they are in their journey as mom and come along side them and help them. As a result, this school year this is where I want to focus my direction and I have made the decision to back out of as much of the children's ministry stuff as I possibly can. I was able to resign from AWANA (tough leaving those cubbies) and am working on getting off the preschool children's church rotation although we are already shorthanded so I really need to find my replacement first! I rotate in the nursery during Sunday School with our pastor's wife and hope to find someone there too. You must understand though - saying no is not easy for me but I am hopeful that through the grace and direction of the Lord I can make these tough choices so that I can be more intentional about serving the women not only in our church but also in our community!
The other area of ministry that I am passionate about is High School girls! I love them, they are awesome and I just cherish each of them so much! I am determined that this year we are going to have some high school girl only activities and we are going to grow together! Can't wait to see how the Lord uses that!!!
Today I am just thankful for clarity and direction to make the RIGHT decisions even though they are the tough ones!!
Monday, August 16, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Friends~~
I must say that I have been SO blessed to call many people my friend. There are different types of friends and obviously some are closer than others but I am blessed. I want to tell you a special story though about a few of my friends.
Being in ministry, it is hard to have close true friendships in which you can allow yourself to be TOTALLY 100% transparent. I mean, yes you go and do fun things together and you may chat about work, kids, receipes, etc but you can't just lay it all out there. This has probably been one of the biggest challenges for me as a minister's wife. I am a social person - seriously! I can't stand to be home more than like half a day before I am bored, I love to be with people.
While in college, I developed an AMAZING friendship. Sharon and I are TOTALLY opposite and yet we are so incredibly close! Sharon is quiet, likes Winnie the Pooh, loves to sew and cook. Ha ha me? I like to talk, watch action movies and sewing is meant for the factories and I am fine to pay someone to cook. Yet, for whatever reason we connected and have an amazing friendship in which we can share anything and everything. Sharon was there when I lost my sister, she was there a year later when our sweet friend Anita was killed in a car accident, she was there in my wedding, there for my first baby and we were even in the hospital at the same time with my third and her first! I can go for MONTHS without talking to Sharon, pick up the phone and it is like I saw her yesterday. The really cool thing is that Sharon grew up in a minister's family and so she knows the ups and downs of ministry....so she even can relate to that!
However, after graduating from college and moving on, Sharon and I were separated by distance and so although we still talk we can't get together near as much as we would like! As we went from church to church and one ministry to another throughout the past 15 years - I prayed for a friend that would be in the same town as me that I could TRULY relate to and be open with. Joel joined me in that prayer that it wouldn't just be a friend for ME but another couple that would be truly friends with us and that we would share interests with, life with, etc. So many times I almost gave in and said "never mind, guess it isn't that important". Yet - God is faithful! He hears the cry of His people and He answers!
When we moved to Bayfield Colorado, we were so blessed to be in a church that had younger families and couples. There are many that we are able to do things with and relate with. However - God had not forgotten my prayer for a couple that we could be open and close with. He answered! Dani and Tony entered our lives through church. I can't tell you that I specifically remember the day we met - I am sure it was one of our first Sundays here. However I CAN tell you when Dani and I connected and had a bond. It was at women's retreat when we were trying to sneak in a window of another ladies room and Dani said something about "this is an immaculate conception!" We looked at each other and laughed and laughed and laughed some more! Throughout the next several months our families came to know one another and a special friendship was built. As it turned out - Dani and Tony were BOTH preacher's kids and knew what life in the limelight of ministry was like so once again we could relate. Having another couple that is friends with you and can relate to you in ministry is so unique and so incredibly special. I am so blessed that not only did the Lord see fit to answer my prayer for a friend - He gave me someone who was married to a man who could be a friend to my husband.
Others have special places in my heart. For instance, my friend Misty from Wayland is like a solid rock and inspiration to me. She has 4 kids similar in ages to mine, she has a husband that is battling cancer, and she loves the Lord with all her heart! My friend Olivia here in Bayfield is like the calm and quiet that comes after the storm...she has such a tender heart and loves to serve others from the background. Of course, my Phi Chi sisters have been there too and that is a bond that can't be broken either! Several others come to mind as I turn the pages of my life - don't get offended if I didn't mention you by name because that isn't my point in this post. This is just a post to say how much friendship means to me!
All this to say - I am so thankful for the close friends I have been blessed with. For those that laugh, cry, and just sit with me. For those that hurt when I hurt and aren't afraid to point out my weaknesses or when I am wrong. For those that despite the curve balls life throws - are still there.
Just this past week, Satan challenged my friendship with Dani. It wasn't anything either her or I did but rather just some mean and hurtful things that were said to us and about us. I began to seriously feel guilty that I had made this special friend within the church - as though I didn't have the right to be closer to one person than another. However, I was reminded of this solid truth. Why would I question when God answered a prayer I had prayed for 15 years? Why would I feel guilty because the ONE who created me chose to love me enough to place a friend in my life? You see, the enemy doesn't want our happiness, he doesn't want us united with other believers - he wants us divided and angry and hurt. Thankfully, the Lord has blessed me with a David/Jonathan relationship and we were able to dodge the firey balls thrown from the enemy through prayer and acceptance of one another!
God knows our EVERY need. He created us to be relational, he created us to desire and long for close friendships and because He created us, He will bless us and meet our needs. Thanks Jesus!
Being in ministry, it is hard to have close true friendships in which you can allow yourself to be TOTALLY 100% transparent. I mean, yes you go and do fun things together and you may chat about work, kids, receipes, etc but you can't just lay it all out there. This has probably been one of the biggest challenges for me as a minister's wife. I am a social person - seriously! I can't stand to be home more than like half a day before I am bored, I love to be with people.
While in college, I developed an AMAZING friendship. Sharon and I are TOTALLY opposite and yet we are so incredibly close! Sharon is quiet, likes Winnie the Pooh, loves to sew and cook. Ha ha me? I like to talk, watch action movies and sewing is meant for the factories and I am fine to pay someone to cook. Yet, for whatever reason we connected and have an amazing friendship in which we can share anything and everything. Sharon was there when I lost my sister, she was there a year later when our sweet friend Anita was killed in a car accident, she was there in my wedding, there for my first baby and we were even in the hospital at the same time with my third and her first! I can go for MONTHS without talking to Sharon, pick up the phone and it is like I saw her yesterday. The really cool thing is that Sharon grew up in a minister's family and so she knows the ups and downs of ministry....so she even can relate to that!
However, after graduating from college and moving on, Sharon and I were separated by distance and so although we still talk we can't get together near as much as we would like! As we went from church to church and one ministry to another throughout the past 15 years - I prayed for a friend that would be in the same town as me that I could TRULY relate to and be open with. Joel joined me in that prayer that it wouldn't just be a friend for ME but another couple that would be truly friends with us and that we would share interests with, life with, etc. So many times I almost gave in and said "never mind, guess it isn't that important". Yet - God is faithful! He hears the cry of His people and He answers!
When we moved to Bayfield Colorado, we were so blessed to be in a church that had younger families and couples. There are many that we are able to do things with and relate with. However - God had not forgotten my prayer for a couple that we could be open and close with. He answered! Dani and Tony entered our lives through church. I can't tell you that I specifically remember the day we met - I am sure it was one of our first Sundays here. However I CAN tell you when Dani and I connected and had a bond. It was at women's retreat when we were trying to sneak in a window of another ladies room and Dani said something about "this is an immaculate conception!" We looked at each other and laughed and laughed and laughed some more! Throughout the next several months our families came to know one another and a special friendship was built. As it turned out - Dani and Tony were BOTH preacher's kids and knew what life in the limelight of ministry was like so once again we could relate. Having another couple that is friends with you and can relate to you in ministry is so unique and so incredibly special. I am so blessed that not only did the Lord see fit to answer my prayer for a friend - He gave me someone who was married to a man who could be a friend to my husband.
Others have special places in my heart. For instance, my friend Misty from Wayland is like a solid rock and inspiration to me. She has 4 kids similar in ages to mine, she has a husband that is battling cancer, and she loves the Lord with all her heart! My friend Olivia here in Bayfield is like the calm and quiet that comes after the storm...she has such a tender heart and loves to serve others from the background. Of course, my Phi Chi sisters have been there too and that is a bond that can't be broken either! Several others come to mind as I turn the pages of my life - don't get offended if I didn't mention you by name because that isn't my point in this post. This is just a post to say how much friendship means to me!
All this to say - I am so thankful for the close friends I have been blessed with. For those that laugh, cry, and just sit with me. For those that hurt when I hurt and aren't afraid to point out my weaknesses or when I am wrong. For those that despite the curve balls life throws - are still there.
Just this past week, Satan challenged my friendship with Dani. It wasn't anything either her or I did but rather just some mean and hurtful things that were said to us and about us. I began to seriously feel guilty that I had made this special friend within the church - as though I didn't have the right to be closer to one person than another. However, I was reminded of this solid truth. Why would I question when God answered a prayer I had prayed for 15 years? Why would I feel guilty because the ONE who created me chose to love me enough to place a friend in my life? You see, the enemy doesn't want our happiness, he doesn't want us united with other believers - he wants us divided and angry and hurt. Thankfully, the Lord has blessed me with a David/Jonathan relationship and we were able to dodge the firey balls thrown from the enemy through prayer and acceptance of one another!
God knows our EVERY need. He created us to be relational, he created us to desire and long for close friendships and because He created us, He will bless us and meet our needs. Thanks Jesus!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
A Challenging Request from the Father....
As I began to pray about how to truly prepare for my trip to Zim (shortened version of Zimbabwe), the Lord laid several things on my heart. To begin with, having been in ministry I know the importance of spiritually preparing yourself for intense times of ministry such as a retreat, a missions trip, a concert, etc. I knew that I would need to get my heart and mind completely and totally focused 100% on Christ and this trip. Next I knew that emotionally I would need to prepare myself for seperation anxiety, heartbreak, etc. Finally, I knew that physically I would need to be in the best possible condition that I could be in.
The question came as to how could I best prepare for this? I thought of going away for a time like the Jesus did when he spent 40 days in the wilderness but I realized that probably wasn't the best idea or realistic. I considered just reading a book of the Bible through but somehow didn't seem quite right. I prayed about going on daily "prayer walks" around the lake near our home - not a bad option but just didn't seem to be what the Lord was calling me to do.
Finally, it hit me, I needed to fast. Christ led by example in fasting and it is mentioned several times in the Word that we are to fast. However, I felt led that whatever I did I needed to do it for the month leading up to my trip meaning that I would begin on Aug 12. Fasting from food didn't really seem like the wisest thing to do physically so I just asked the Lord to lead me and to show me what I needed to do.
The answer was simple: eat your normal meals but drink only water for the 30 days before you leave. WHAT?!!! Are you kidding me God? Can't I just give up like candy bars or ice cream or something like that? If you know me, you know that I am hooked on Coke/Dr. Pepper like most people are hooked on coffee! Okay - the day doesn't go good without that little boost of caffine! Yet - the more I prayed the stronger I felt that this was the way to go - I needed to drink only water for the month before the trip.
I share this with you not to brag or say look at me but rather to tell you that I know it will be a struggle and I would ask you to pray with me in this regard. I am confident that through this fast, the Lord will use it as a time for me to prepare spiritually, physically, and emotionally and even mentally for the trip. Tomorrow is Aug 12 and I will begin this journey...my prayer is to be committed and follow through for the 30 days unless released by the Lord to do otherwise.
Acts 13:2 Says:"While they were worshipping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, 'Set apart Barnabus and Saul for the work to which I have called.'" You see, it was through their time of fasting that God gave specific instructions to the leaders of the church. There are many times that I want to hear God and yet I don't and I think it is because I need to be more intentional about my worship and my fasting.
I like to challenge those I share with at times, so today's challenge is: What is God challenging YOU to do in order to prepare for service for Him?
The question came as to how could I best prepare for this? I thought of going away for a time like the Jesus did when he spent 40 days in the wilderness but I realized that probably wasn't the best idea or realistic. I considered just reading a book of the Bible through but somehow didn't seem quite right. I prayed about going on daily "prayer walks" around the lake near our home - not a bad option but just didn't seem to be what the Lord was calling me to do.
Finally, it hit me, I needed to fast. Christ led by example in fasting and it is mentioned several times in the Word that we are to fast. However, I felt led that whatever I did I needed to do it for the month leading up to my trip meaning that I would begin on Aug 12. Fasting from food didn't really seem like the wisest thing to do physically so I just asked the Lord to lead me and to show me what I needed to do.
The answer was simple: eat your normal meals but drink only water for the 30 days before you leave. WHAT?!!! Are you kidding me God? Can't I just give up like candy bars or ice cream or something like that? If you know me, you know that I am hooked on Coke/Dr. Pepper like most people are hooked on coffee! Okay - the day doesn't go good without that little boost of caffine! Yet - the more I prayed the stronger I felt that this was the way to go - I needed to drink only water for the month before the trip.
I share this with you not to brag or say look at me but rather to tell you that I know it will be a struggle and I would ask you to pray with me in this regard. I am confident that through this fast, the Lord will use it as a time for me to prepare spiritually, physically, and emotionally and even mentally for the trip. Tomorrow is Aug 12 and I will begin this journey...my prayer is to be committed and follow through for the 30 days unless released by the Lord to do otherwise.
Acts 13:2 Says:"While they were worshipping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, 'Set apart Barnabus and Saul for the work to which I have called.'" You see, it was through their time of fasting that God gave specific instructions to the leaders of the church. There are many times that I want to hear God and yet I don't and I think it is because I need to be more intentional about my worship and my fasting.
I like to challenge those I share with at times, so today's challenge is: What is God challenging YOU to do in order to prepare for service for Him?
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Africa...are you for real?
As many of you may know, I will be headed to Zimbabwe Africa in just over a month. Although the trip itself is interesting and obviously will be something I blog about when I return, I want to share with you how the Lord has brought me to this point of even going.
The journey of the trip really begins many years ago in a church in Pagosa Springs Colorado with a much younger me. Growing up in church, we hear and learn about all sorts of missionaries - through Sunday School, Girls in Action, AWANA, sermons, mission offerings, etc. I was no different - I probably could have told you by the age of 5 what a missionary was and maybe could have even named a country or two where I knew there were missionaries.
However - knowing ABOUT missionaries and missions is MUCH different than actually knowing a missionary personally. About the time I was 12 years old, a family from our church was called to be missionaries to a place called Kenya Africa. You must understand that our church was small and everyone knew everyone else VERY well. My family was close friends with the family of Bay and Peg Forrest who were going to Africa. I remember all to well MANY fundraisers for them (I still have a cookbook which was one of the fundraisers!) I remember hearing their story about being called and I remember Bay coming by our house the morning they were leaving to pick up some last minute supplies. This is when mission work and missionaries became a reality for me. Now, not only did I know about missionaries I KNEW missionaries! Bay and Peg and their three kids were real live people that I could identify with.
Knowing the Forrest family and hearing about their time as missionaries in Kenya provided me with a lot of knowledge and information about not only the life of a missionary but also about Africa. I will not say that I had a specific call to go to the continent of Africa in particular, but I knew that someday I wanted to be a part in missions and perhaps one day go on a missions trip somewhere overseas. However, it wouldn't be until the age of 17 that I would completely and totally commit myself to serving the Lord no matter where He called - that is another story but just noteworthy here.
After meeting and marrying my amazing husband (he paid me to say that!) and entering the life of ministry God revealed and opened up to me a whole new realm of missions that has ultimately changed my life forever. In the spring of 1997, God ordained it to where my path would once again cross with Bay and Peg Forrest. By this time, they had returned from Africa back to Pagosa and were Directors of a youth ministry called the Power House. Joel and I were in Idalou Texas where he was going to school at Wayland Baptist University and was youth pastor at FBC Idalou. We were expecting our first child and life was really pretty good for us. One night, in a phone conversation with my mom she asked me to be praying for Bay and Peg and the Power House because they were in desperate need of a Jr. High Director at the Power House. Let me emphasize - there was NO mention of US taking the position. It truly was a prayer request - however once I passed it on to Joel things changed. The Holy Spirit would not allow Joel to let go of the possibility of us going to be on staff at the Power House. There are lots of things that took place but suffice it to say, by July 1997 we were moving with our new baby girl to Pagosa. The Power House was under Focus Ministries which was a support based ministry and yes, you guessed it, we had to RAISE our support - just like overseas missionaries. It was about 3 or 4 months into it when it really hit me - I WAS A MISSIONARY! No, not somewhere far off and exotic like Africa or China or India but right in my hometown of Pagosa Springs Colorado. There is nothing liking raising support for your family that can teach you about faith and miracles!
Well, obviously we aren't at the Power House any more, ironically neither are Bay and Peg although they are still Focus Ministries and they do raise their support, but our relationship with them is still strong and they truly are our mentors in every aspect of our life from marriage, parenting, ministry, etc. All this brings me to the point of telling you, that although not specifically called to be a missionary in Africa (although we are always open to where God leads) Africa holds a special place in our hearts due to our connection with Bay and Peg.
Back to the mission trip though - remember I said that I knew SOMEDAY I would go on a missions trip? Well, I have had that opportunity to go on many missions trips within the US and also one to Juarez Mexico. However - God has never opened the door to go overseas until now. A little over a year ago, a trip to Zimbabwe was in the making and was mentioned to our church. Immediately I thought "I want to go!" However, at the time the only other person going from our church was our Pastor and I just didn't see that being a reality. Yet, it did not leave my mind that perhaps I COULD go soon!
Fast forward to April 2010 and a dinner with our VERY close friends Dani and Tony Vaughn. Dani had mentioned previous to the dinner that she and one of our youth were going to Zimbabwe in Sept. While at dinner, in a totally joking manner, I told Joel "Hey, I am going to let you take the kids and I am going to Zim with Dani and Tab!" We all laughed and went on with dinner. On the way home, not joking, Joel said something to the effect that he thought I should go. I told him it was a JOKE and he said "No, really you should go." So, I prayed about it that night, called Dani the next day I think and told her I wanted to go. Just when you think you have it all figured out - God has to throw a curve ball! I remember laying in bed one night and praying to God about the trip. I wanted to make sure that it wasn't just some whim decision or some "fun" idea that I had and I remember God saying "Go to Africa" and I made this comittment to go - "God, I will go to Africa EVEN if Dani doesn't go or Tab can't go as long as there is a way to go." Careful what you commit to - the next day I meet with Dani at the park and she tells me that she isn't sure she is going to go. After a month or so, she tells me that no she isn't going but she will help us prepare - God knew what we didn't and that was that she would be pregnant with their fourth child at the time of the trip. So - here I am, going to Africa with Tab (one of our youth) and a team of about 9 others from the state of Colorado.
I am excited and yet VERY nervous about the trip. The preparation hasn't been smooth, it has been very different being on the side of just a member on the team versus the planner, I don't know any of the other adults that well, I have to leave my 4 kids for 15 days, and most of all my best friend and partner in ministry (Joel) is not going with me. However - despite all this - God continues to assure me and encourage me that this is HIS will and He has something in store for me!
So, why Africa? Simply because God said, "Go". I asked MANY people their thoughts and opinions about whether or not I should go and I received a 100% yes (I think I was secretly hoping SOMEONE would have a red flag).
Please pray for me as I am now one month away from flying out on Sept 12. Pray for peace about leaving my husband and kids, pray for my physical health - this is HUGE to me, pray for my spiritual health, and pray for the people of Zimbabwe Africa that I will be meeting and sharing the Gospel with. I have taken all the "precautions" that have been recommended to ensure a healthy trip but even with those there is a risk of getting sick - I believe that God is in the business of protection and I believe that through the prayers of His people - I can and will remain 100% healthy before, during, and after the trip.
Tomorrow will be another post about an challengin calling God has placed on my heart....
The journey of the trip really begins many years ago in a church in Pagosa Springs Colorado with a much younger me. Growing up in church, we hear and learn about all sorts of missionaries - through Sunday School, Girls in Action, AWANA, sermons, mission offerings, etc. I was no different - I probably could have told you by the age of 5 what a missionary was and maybe could have even named a country or two where I knew there were missionaries.
However - knowing ABOUT missionaries and missions is MUCH different than actually knowing a missionary personally. About the time I was 12 years old, a family from our church was called to be missionaries to a place called Kenya Africa. You must understand that our church was small and everyone knew everyone else VERY well. My family was close friends with the family of Bay and Peg Forrest who were going to Africa. I remember all to well MANY fundraisers for them (I still have a cookbook which was one of the fundraisers!) I remember hearing their story about being called and I remember Bay coming by our house the morning they were leaving to pick up some last minute supplies. This is when mission work and missionaries became a reality for me. Now, not only did I know about missionaries I KNEW missionaries! Bay and Peg and their three kids were real live people that I could identify with.
Knowing the Forrest family and hearing about their time as missionaries in Kenya provided me with a lot of knowledge and information about not only the life of a missionary but also about Africa. I will not say that I had a specific call to go to the continent of Africa in particular, but I knew that someday I wanted to be a part in missions and perhaps one day go on a missions trip somewhere overseas. However, it wouldn't be until the age of 17 that I would completely and totally commit myself to serving the Lord no matter where He called - that is another story but just noteworthy here.
After meeting and marrying my amazing husband (he paid me to say that!) and entering the life of ministry God revealed and opened up to me a whole new realm of missions that has ultimately changed my life forever. In the spring of 1997, God ordained it to where my path would once again cross with Bay and Peg Forrest. By this time, they had returned from Africa back to Pagosa and were Directors of a youth ministry called the Power House. Joel and I were in Idalou Texas where he was going to school at Wayland Baptist University and was youth pastor at FBC Idalou. We were expecting our first child and life was really pretty good for us. One night, in a phone conversation with my mom she asked me to be praying for Bay and Peg and the Power House because they were in desperate need of a Jr. High Director at the Power House. Let me emphasize - there was NO mention of US taking the position. It truly was a prayer request - however once I passed it on to Joel things changed. The Holy Spirit would not allow Joel to let go of the possibility of us going to be on staff at the Power House. There are lots of things that took place but suffice it to say, by July 1997 we were moving with our new baby girl to Pagosa. The Power House was under Focus Ministries which was a support based ministry and yes, you guessed it, we had to RAISE our support - just like overseas missionaries. It was about 3 or 4 months into it when it really hit me - I WAS A MISSIONARY! No, not somewhere far off and exotic like Africa or China or India but right in my hometown of Pagosa Springs Colorado. There is nothing liking raising support for your family that can teach you about faith and miracles!
Well, obviously we aren't at the Power House any more, ironically neither are Bay and Peg although they are still Focus Ministries and they do raise their support, but our relationship with them is still strong and they truly are our mentors in every aspect of our life from marriage, parenting, ministry, etc. All this brings me to the point of telling you, that although not specifically called to be a missionary in Africa (although we are always open to where God leads) Africa holds a special place in our hearts due to our connection with Bay and Peg.
Back to the mission trip though - remember I said that I knew SOMEDAY I would go on a missions trip? Well, I have had that opportunity to go on many missions trips within the US and also one to Juarez Mexico. However - God has never opened the door to go overseas until now. A little over a year ago, a trip to Zimbabwe was in the making and was mentioned to our church. Immediately I thought "I want to go!" However, at the time the only other person going from our church was our Pastor and I just didn't see that being a reality. Yet, it did not leave my mind that perhaps I COULD go soon!
Fast forward to April 2010 and a dinner with our VERY close friends Dani and Tony Vaughn. Dani had mentioned previous to the dinner that she and one of our youth were going to Zimbabwe in Sept. While at dinner, in a totally joking manner, I told Joel "Hey, I am going to let you take the kids and I am going to Zim with Dani and Tab!" We all laughed and went on with dinner. On the way home, not joking, Joel said something to the effect that he thought I should go. I told him it was a JOKE and he said "No, really you should go." So, I prayed about it that night, called Dani the next day I think and told her I wanted to go. Just when you think you have it all figured out - God has to throw a curve ball! I remember laying in bed one night and praying to God about the trip. I wanted to make sure that it wasn't just some whim decision or some "fun" idea that I had and I remember God saying "Go to Africa" and I made this comittment to go - "God, I will go to Africa EVEN if Dani doesn't go or Tab can't go as long as there is a way to go." Careful what you commit to - the next day I meet with Dani at the park and she tells me that she isn't sure she is going to go. After a month or so, she tells me that no she isn't going but she will help us prepare - God knew what we didn't and that was that she would be pregnant with their fourth child at the time of the trip. So - here I am, going to Africa with Tab (one of our youth) and a team of about 9 others from the state of Colorado.
I am excited and yet VERY nervous about the trip. The preparation hasn't been smooth, it has been very different being on the side of just a member on the team versus the planner, I don't know any of the other adults that well, I have to leave my 4 kids for 15 days, and most of all my best friend and partner in ministry (Joel) is not going with me. However - despite all this - God continues to assure me and encourage me that this is HIS will and He has something in store for me!
So, why Africa? Simply because God said, "Go". I asked MANY people their thoughts and opinions about whether or not I should go and I received a 100% yes (I think I was secretly hoping SOMEONE would have a red flag).
Please pray for me as I am now one month away from flying out on Sept 12. Pray for peace about leaving my husband and kids, pray for my physical health - this is HUGE to me, pray for my spiritual health, and pray for the people of Zimbabwe Africa that I will be meeting and sharing the Gospel with. I have taken all the "precautions" that have been recommended to ensure a healthy trip but even with those there is a risk of getting sick - I believe that God is in the business of protection and I believe that through the prayers of His people - I can and will remain 100% healthy before, during, and after the trip.
Tomorrow will be another post about an challengin calling God has placed on my heart....
Friday, August 6, 2010
Resurrecting the blog
So, I must admit that journaling has always been a struggle for me! I know that I should do it, I see the value in it and yet I still struggle with it. I think it is mainly because at times my mind just goes too many directions to stay focused! I sit down to write or type and then the phone rings, the kids call, dishes need done, laundry is calling, etc. You get the idea.
However - the past week or so the Lord has kept urging me to just write down my thoughts and my feelings SOMEWHERE! So, since I seem to enjoy the computer the most I have decided to get better about my blog!
One thing I think that has prompted this is simply that I have blinked and life has passed! Seriously! In two weeks, school will be starting again and this is a mile-stone year in a lot of ways. We will have TWO of our four kids in Jr. High! Holy Cow - weren't they just babies crawling around the gym at the Power House? Weren't they the ones I rocked to sleep? Now one of them is 13 and 5'6" tall and the other is 12 and learning how to use a combination lock for his gym locker! Don't get me wrong - I do enjoy the independance that being older brings, it's just that it is hard to swallow the idea that they are growing up!
In addition to that, Kestra and Tyler are changing more and more too! I mean, if the other two have to grow up okay but seriously, do my "babies" have to grow up? Kestra just came in the room and asked me to straighten her hair the first day of school! What happened to pony tails and bows....sniff sniff. Tyler isn't any better as he literally cooked half of dinner tonight with me!
As all four of the kids grow up - I have this incredible sense of urgency. It's as though I realize that truly the time is short for me to instill in them values and morals that are godly and pure. I know some of you are thinking - hello? Your husband is a youth pastor of course they are grounded spiritually. However, I can't help but question if I REALLY do enough. This week, there was this major discussion on my Facebook page, yes I admit I am a FB junkie, about homosexuality. I was amazed to discover that young people who I know are Christians really wonder if homosexuality is a sin. It made me question - am I raising my kids to take a STRONG stand for righteousness or am I allowing them to learn to be 'tolerant' of those who are different. This is just one example of things that I hope I am teaching them. I did ask Hannah her thoughts on the Facebook discussion - she said that she admits and knows homosexuality is wrong but it's complicated. She is pondering and reading the Word though and I know it will speak truth to her.
The other thing that I am really struggling with right now is that I don't have a close friend who is in this same stage of life that I am in. Please don't get me wrong, I have some AMAZING friends in my life and very close ones both here in Bayfield and other places. My struggle is that they either have young preschool kids (Lord bless them!) or they have already raised their kids and want to pass on what worked (which I TRULY do appreciate) but there are days that I just want to talk to another mom of a teenager and say "don't you get sick of them sighing and rolling their eyes!" or to have be able to talk about what it will be like next year with one in HS. I know that there are these people out there and one of the things I have set as a personal goal this year is to seek them and take the time to get to know them! Don't we all just get too too busy we forget about relationships? Anyway, don't mistake me, I LOVE where we live the people we serve with and all of it but when you are past the diapers, potty training, kindergarten, etc it's nice to know that you aren't alone! I DO love my preschool mom friends dearly and I know what it is like to be there - remember I had 4 under the age of 4 in my house!
Okay - well there is something else on my mind but I am not sure I am ready to type about that yet. Perhaps it is better left for an actual journal or another day because I am still processing it in my head. So for now, this will suffice as my journaling!
However - the past week or so the Lord has kept urging me to just write down my thoughts and my feelings SOMEWHERE! So, since I seem to enjoy the computer the most I have decided to get better about my blog!
One thing I think that has prompted this is simply that I have blinked and life has passed! Seriously! In two weeks, school will be starting again and this is a mile-stone year in a lot of ways. We will have TWO of our four kids in Jr. High! Holy Cow - weren't they just babies crawling around the gym at the Power House? Weren't they the ones I rocked to sleep? Now one of them is 13 and 5'6" tall and the other is 12 and learning how to use a combination lock for his gym locker! Don't get me wrong - I do enjoy the independance that being older brings, it's just that it is hard to swallow the idea that they are growing up!
In addition to that, Kestra and Tyler are changing more and more too! I mean, if the other two have to grow up okay but seriously, do my "babies" have to grow up? Kestra just came in the room and asked me to straighten her hair the first day of school! What happened to pony tails and bows....sniff sniff. Tyler isn't any better as he literally cooked half of dinner tonight with me!
As all four of the kids grow up - I have this incredible sense of urgency. It's as though I realize that truly the time is short for me to instill in them values and morals that are godly and pure. I know some of you are thinking - hello? Your husband is a youth pastor of course they are grounded spiritually. However, I can't help but question if I REALLY do enough. This week, there was this major discussion on my Facebook page, yes I admit I am a FB junkie, about homosexuality. I was amazed to discover that young people who I know are Christians really wonder if homosexuality is a sin. It made me question - am I raising my kids to take a STRONG stand for righteousness or am I allowing them to learn to be 'tolerant' of those who are different. This is just one example of things that I hope I am teaching them. I did ask Hannah her thoughts on the Facebook discussion - she said that she admits and knows homosexuality is wrong but it's complicated. She is pondering and reading the Word though and I know it will speak truth to her.
The other thing that I am really struggling with right now is that I don't have a close friend who is in this same stage of life that I am in. Please don't get me wrong, I have some AMAZING friends in my life and very close ones both here in Bayfield and other places. My struggle is that they either have young preschool kids (Lord bless them!) or they have already raised their kids and want to pass on what worked (which I TRULY do appreciate) but there are days that I just want to talk to another mom of a teenager and say "don't you get sick of them sighing and rolling their eyes!" or to have be able to talk about what it will be like next year with one in HS. I know that there are these people out there and one of the things I have set as a personal goal this year is to seek them and take the time to get to know them! Don't we all just get too too busy we forget about relationships? Anyway, don't mistake me, I LOVE where we live the people we serve with and all of it but when you are past the diapers, potty training, kindergarten, etc it's nice to know that you aren't alone! I DO love my preschool mom friends dearly and I know what it is like to be there - remember I had 4 under the age of 4 in my house!
Okay - well there is something else on my mind but I am not sure I am ready to type about that yet. Perhaps it is better left for an actual journal or another day because I am still processing it in my head. So for now, this will suffice as my journaling!
Friday, November 20, 2009
Where did November go?
Oh my goodness! It has been AGES since I have posted and I am not sure where the time has gone!
November has been a good month for us. We have been busy with school, work, church and kids activities. Hannah finished volleyball, had a week off and jumped into basketball! She is learning that basketball is a little "rougher" than volleyball but is doing well at it none-the-less!
Malachi is a typical 5th grade boy - more concerned with playing than with turning in homework but is doing better with a little "motivation" from Mom and Dad.
Kestra will be 10 on Sunday! Did I just type that right? Yep! She is our bundle of joy and keeps us smiling almost all the time. She is all girl and insists on changing clothes at least 5 times!!!!
Tyler is as active as ever! He is loving school and growing up way too fast. There is always a Tyler story to share. The most recent was just a moment ago when I looked out the window to find him "hitch hiking" in my drive way!!! Oh - have to watch that boy!
Joel is still very busy with the church and loves his job! We had a Country Western Jamboree last Friday and Joel did a GREAT job organizing it! Pictures later!
I have been busy between being a mom/wife, working for my Dad's Appraisal business and subbing in the school. I really enjoy both jobs! I finished a Bible Study here in our church on Nov 5th only to turn and start another one on November 12 with some young moms both from my parent's church and my church. I have found that I really have a passion to come along side moms of preschoolers and encourage them and share my experiences with them. I am not sure what this will lead to in the future but I know that the Lord is DEFINITELY opening up the door for this ministry right now!
This next week we are looking forward to my sister Michelle and her family being here for Thanksgiving. It will be so much fun to have all the cousins together and to just spend time as a family.
For Christmas we will be going to Kerrville TX to vacation with Joel's family as we celebrate his parents 50th anniversary (it was in August but Christmas is when we could all go). It will again be another wonderful week with family.
I know this is kind of "scattered" and definitely need to get back into blogging more regularly! I really need to figure out how to post some pictures creatively as well!
Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
Ronnie
November has been a good month for us. We have been busy with school, work, church and kids activities. Hannah finished volleyball, had a week off and jumped into basketball! She is learning that basketball is a little "rougher" than volleyball but is doing well at it none-the-less!
Malachi is a typical 5th grade boy - more concerned with playing than with turning in homework but is doing better with a little "motivation" from Mom and Dad.
Kestra will be 10 on Sunday! Did I just type that right? Yep! She is our bundle of joy and keeps us smiling almost all the time. She is all girl and insists on changing clothes at least 5 times!!!!
Tyler is as active as ever! He is loving school and growing up way too fast. There is always a Tyler story to share. The most recent was just a moment ago when I looked out the window to find him "hitch hiking" in my drive way!!! Oh - have to watch that boy!
Joel is still very busy with the church and loves his job! We had a Country Western Jamboree last Friday and Joel did a GREAT job organizing it! Pictures later!
I have been busy between being a mom/wife, working for my Dad's Appraisal business and subbing in the school. I really enjoy both jobs! I finished a Bible Study here in our church on Nov 5th only to turn and start another one on November 12 with some young moms both from my parent's church and my church. I have found that I really have a passion to come along side moms of preschoolers and encourage them and share my experiences with them. I am not sure what this will lead to in the future but I know that the Lord is DEFINITELY opening up the door for this ministry right now!
This next week we are looking forward to my sister Michelle and her family being here for Thanksgiving. It will be so much fun to have all the cousins together and to just spend time as a family.
For Christmas we will be going to Kerrville TX to vacation with Joel's family as we celebrate his parents 50th anniversary (it was in August but Christmas is when we could all go). It will again be another wonderful week with family.
I know this is kind of "scattered" and definitely need to get back into blogging more regularly! I really need to figure out how to post some pictures creatively as well!
Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
Ronnie
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