The need for some order to the chaos

Ok - just going to lay it out there...the past two months of my life can be summed up in
one word - CHAOTIC!

I wish that I could say that this was a simple case of a busy schedule and the many activities that we have been going to, truth is I can't. I am serious when I say that EVERYTHING in my life has just been one big jumbled ball of CHAOS...my home life, my spiritual life, social life, emotional life, etc...you get the picture.

Well, this weekend - it has come to a head and I AM DONE WITH CHAOS! I have literally come to the point where it is so messed up that I can not function well in ANY realm of my life. Rather than doing anything well - it has been a matter of simply attempting to keep my head above water.

Don't misunderstand - just like anything in life that is broken and not right; I know that it didn't get this way overnight and so therefore I can't fix it overnight BUT I can start taking the steps to put order, direction and organization back into my life and set-up protective measures so that it doesn't get that way again.

When I really began to see this for what it was this morning - I was a little taken off guard and then overwhelmed by the task of fixing it. I thought - "why is this SO imperitive to me?" Then - I got it tonight at the Truth Project...God IS NOT a God of disorder but of ORDER! Everything He does, everything He created, who He is screams - ORDER! So therefore, as His child - I am CREATED to have order in my life! This is why the overwhelming need to have order back in my life has consumed me, this is why I haven't felt at peace about anything at all!

Just like any problem - before you can truly find the solution you have to identify the problem and seek to discover how you got there. For me - there are a few factors: first, not setting goals that are realistic and attainable; second, not staying focused; third, not saying a simple word NO; and finally, not seeking the Lord as to what I should and shouldn't be doing. I have been jumping in and doing things simply because they needed to be done and no one else seemed to be doing them, I have let procrastination in other areas rule, and I have lost sight of the things that the Lord has specifically called me to do!

Now that I know HOW I got there....I intend to get it back in order and focused. First - I am not taking on any "new" endeavors until I have a good handle and grasp on those things in my life currently. Second - I am eliminating some VERY specific things that the Lord, through my husband's leadership, has asked me to give up and allow someone else to do. Third - I am going back to my FIRST love of Jesus and SECOND love my husband with my kids being a close THIRD and anything else after that.

This doesn't mean that I am dropping everything. I am a firm believer that there are ministries, tasks, and opportunities that God has for us. In following Christ's example - I see that yes He took times of rest but He never TOTALLY stepped away from it... I plan to carve those "times of rest" into my everyday schedule - times where I simply enjoy the quiet house, or the birds singing, or the sound of my kids laughter. Times when I am not "busy" but like Mary - sit at the feet of my Savior soaking up Him!!!

Hopefully in posting this - two things will happen: I will know that others can hold me accountable AND I can encourage someone else who has come to the realization that their life is a jumbled ball of chaos to work toward order....

So - I would ask that if you read this you would take the time and ask me if I am seeking order rather than chaos AND if you need someone who totally gets it to hold you accountable - I AM HERE!!!

I am truly excited about going down this path - this week's focus for restoring ORDER:
1. Consistent Quiet time every day - which has not happened in a long while
2. The HOUSE - it is a literal WRECK! This week is devoted to getting it in order!

"For God is not a God of disorder but of peace." I Corinthians 14:33